Career Assessment Test
by tatsukixoxo
Summary: Narumi isn't pleased with his homeroom's results on the CATs so he decides to tell them exactly what he thinks their ideal jobs are... Rated T for some mild language. Ruka's results are up!
1. Introduction: Narumi's Idea

Career  
Assessment  
Test  
C.A.T

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Gakuen Alice or its characters.

* * *

Introduction…

Narumi took his time walking to the staff lounge. Misaki had called and left five messages telling him he was late for a mandatory staff meeting. Naru and blown it off choosing to ignore the messages in order to catch up on some sleep until one came say that Jinno was getting mad. That was enough to get him out of bed and to the staff room. Naru walked in just as Jinno was making his main announcement.

"Finally, the heads of each homeroom will have time this week and next to individually discus with their students the results of the CATs," he said not looking at Narumi. "Everyone is expected to do so accordinly." He sent a death glare in Naru's direction. A paper was placed in front of him. It listed every student in his homeroom's name and the occupation most suited for them. He glanced down the list and grimaced.

"Jin-Jin?" Narumi raised his hand innocently. Jinno stared him down choosing whether or not to ignore the use of the forbidden nickname. "What if we, as teachers, don't think that the jobs selected for our students are… suitable?" Naru took a final look at the paper in his hands.

"Those jobs were hand selected by myself. I see no problem with them." Jinno pursed his lips in a tight line. "If you have a problem-"

"No problem," Naru said collecting his things. Looks like he was going to have a little bit of extra work fixing a little problem with the results of a certain test… He was going to miss some beauty sleep.

* * *

That's the introduction. First chapter coming up...


	2. Sakura Mikan

First Chapter… **Bold is Narumi.**_ Italics are the students. _Regular is everything else.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Gakuen Alice.

* * *

Naru looks at the names on the list. The students themselves had signed up themselves for different time slots to get their results. The only student who had not signed up was of course Natsume. Narumi took care of that right away by scheduling him early on to get it over with. But today the first student was… Sakura Mikan.

**Mikan-chan sit down. **(pulls a chair for Mikan to sit across from him she sits) **So I have here the results of your Career Assessment Test. **

_What test?_

**The one I gave you to take two weeks ago. The last time I was in homeroom.**

_Eh… that was graded._

**Yes Mikan. Wait what do you think that was?**

_I thought it was another of your pointless assignments._

**Wait my assignments aren't pointless!**

(innocently) _But the rest of the class says so. That's why no one took it seriously. _

(to himself) **That explains these results. **(to Mikan) **Back to your results, it says here…uh..um **(clears throat)

_…_

**Never mind what it says. I'm here to tell you what I think the perfect job is for you.**

_But Naru I thought that my job was on the paper. _

**Eh… yes but that's what Jin-Jin thinks you should do based on you alices and school scores and… test results. But I think you'd do a lot better than…erm…. nothing so-**

_Ah what! Jin-Jin thought I couldn't do anything! Thatmeanywhodoeshethinkheis! I'm useful! _(standing)

**Ah no Mikan-chan. **(waving hands in front of face) **I think you would make an amazing au pair.**

_Huh… what's an au pair? _(sitting again)

**It's a babysitter for a rich family. Kind of like a nanny, but you live there and take care of the children.**

_I can use my __alices__?_

(relaxing a bit) **Yes sure. If you work for families with young children with ****alices**** that haven't been found by the academy you can help them plus…**

_Wait if my __alice__ nullifies theirs then they won't be found by the academy._

**…**

_Ohh… Naru-sensei that's bad! Then they won't ever get to meet you!_

**Uh, I think you're missing the point.**

_Don't worry sensei I'll make my own academy. _(standing on chair and pointing) _And you'll be the first teacher to work there. It'll have students with __alices__ and they'll be able to make friends like I did here._

**But Mikan-chan but you need higher grades to become a teacher let alone a principal.**

_… _(frozen)

**Uh… Mikan are you okay?**

_Don't worry I'll study harder to be a teacher! Fight, Fight! I'll need to study all night and drink lots of coffee…I know I'll ask Hotaru if she has made a super coffee machine yet. _(picking up bag) _Thank you sensei. _(walking towards door) _I'll show that Jin-Jin who's a baka now!_

**Mikan-chan wait I'm not done yet!**

Mikan walks out leaving Narumi alone in his classroom once again. Naru put his head on his desk. It didn't quite turn out how he expected. Plus Mikan rushed out before he could give her the rest of his suggestions. But at the very least he accomplished something. Mikan was right he was going to need lots of coffee to get through the rest of these interviews. He glanced at his paper and groaned internally. Up next… Hyuuga Natsume…

* * *

I didn't really like this one that much but it'll get better I promise. Review!


	3. Hyuuga Natsume

Second Chapter… **Bold is Narumi.**_ Italics are the students. _Regular is everything else.  
A special thanks to Kylee-Cat for the idea.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Gakuen Alice.

* * *

Naru snuck a glance the empty clock frame hanging on the wall and then at the door below it. Natsume was probably late but there was no way to tell. Naru tapped his pen on his desk then looked at his wrist. He sighed remembering that he hadn't worn a watch that morning because it clashed with his outfit. He heard a noise coming from the window. So he decided to use the window…

**Come have a seat, **(pointing to chair across from him and smiling) **and we'll get started Natsume-kun.**

_Tch. You're kidding right. Why would I come that close to a hentai like you? _(lounging in window frame)

(popping a vein) **Fine but I'm here to give you the results of the CATs.**

_If that's why you dragged me here. I'm leaving. _(starting to leave)

(ignoring him) **Well Jinno thinks that your career choices are limited to assassin or hired gun. But I think that those jobs are unsuitable for a family man.**

_A family man…_

**Yes, since we all know that you and Mikan-chan are getting married-**

_I wouldn't marry that idiot. Is that what you told her? No wonder she's been acting even stupider after she saw you. Not that I care._

(sing-songing) **Yes you woo-uld. See you love her so-o-o much that you're in de-ni-al.**

_Do you have a death wish? _(flame glowing in hand)

**Have you ever considered being a baker?**

_…_

(smiling and still singing) **You could open a little shop. And with your ****alice**** you could literary hand bake your pastries. And when you and Mikan's children grow up they could- **(dodges ball of fire)

_Shut. Up. Narumi._ (slight panting)

(wiggling finger) **Now, now don't get too excited. Now about that shop… You could mix your names together and call it something cute like Naikan or Mitsume or- **(dodges another flame aimed at head)

_I thought I told you to stop talk you dirty old man. _(prepares another flame)

**Ah, ah be careful where you aim that. **(tucks hair behind ear to reveal lack of restraint earring)

_Dammit. _(hissing through teeth) _You wouldn't._

**Sweet dreams, Natsume-kun. **(kisses on the forehead)

_You perverted bastard. _(faints)

(smugly) **That went well. Now to planning your wedding…**

Naru places the sleeping boy in the grass under the window and walks back to his desk. He loves being able to brighten up children's days. He marks a check on Natsume's file and moves on to the next one on his list. This could get ugly. Up next… Imai Hotaru.

* * *

What we learned today:  
Natsume should get a restraining order and call it a day.  
Narumi should never be allowed around children.  
Wouldn't you like to see Natsume owning a quaint lil' bakery with his and Mikan's little kids running around and calling him papa?

Review!


	4. Imai Hotaru

Third one…

Parts: **Narumi -**_Student -_Random -Descriptions and Crap-_**More crap**_

**Disclaimer:** I didn't know that I owned Gakuen Alice. Wait never mind I don't. Just a dream.

* * *

Naru took a final look around the room. He had searched under, in and around every desk in the room looking for hidden cameras and recorders. He had come in twice as early to make sure the task was done well before Hotaru was scheduled to come in. In his rush he had forgotten to get coffee. Naru sat back down and laid his head on his desk. He closed his eyes in exhaustion. He was lacking sleep from the past few days and night in preparation for these interviews. If only Jinno could have made it a little easier by growing an imagination. There was a sudden popping noise.

_If you're the one who called me in here you should at least be awake. _(removes baka gun from hand an puts away) _Sleeping on the job…_(writing in notebook)

(rubbing head and opening eyes) **What the hell just- **

_Cursing at students… _(writing in notebook)

**I don't curse at students! **(rubs eyes which are bloodshot from lack of sleep)

_Coming to work intoxicated…_(still writing)

**I'm not drunk!**

_Denying accusations while under the influence…_(writing)

**Hotaru-chan you're supposed to be here for your CAT results.**

_I already have a job. Call students in early to harass them…_ (not looking up)

**I don't…**(long pause)** never mind. Imai you're results-**

_So you decided do you're job for once._

(turning pale) **I am doing my job but you shot me with that stupid gun!**

_Belittling students…_(in notebook)

**What are you writing?**

_Just jotting down some things from the teacher handbook that you could get fired for. Seems like you've broken a lot._

… **Are you blackmailing me?**

_Why would I?_

…

_My results… Or are you neglecting the needs of your students?_

(slightly flustered) **Ah yes… here-**

Hotaru-chan!(bursting through door)

_What are you doing here Mikan? You're messing with my business deal._

**Business deal?**

_Someone paid me to get you fired._

**Fired? How can anyone want to get rid of this beautiful face? I'm the most handsome teacher here. Not to mention the most loved by all his students and… **(continues talking to self)

(ignoring conversation) I've been looking for you all yesterday.

(to self) _Looks like the idiot found me._

Hotaru have you been avoiding me?(pouting and getting teary eyed)

_Get away from me you're nose is running._ (holds out baka gun) _What do you want?_

Have you made the coffee maker yet?(sniffling)

_Maybe. I'll give it to you for 1,500 yen._

That's overpriced Hotaru you meany! (gets hit by baka gun and leaves crying)

_You were saying._ (turning to Naru)

(clearing throat) **Anyway the job you have as a... I don't even know what this is. Some building corporation. How about somrthing more fun like a toy designer or t****heme park designer? You don't have to do what the academy says.**

_Hmm… if that's it. If you want the tape of you admitting to cursing at students, coming to school drunk, and being a sexual predator… it's going to cost you._

**Wait I didn't admit to be a sexual predator or any of that other stuff.**

_You did now. _(pulls out tape recorder out from under teacher desk and plays back)

(sighs) **How much?**

_Bribery, hmm. _(writes number on paper and hands over)

**What! That's overpriced**

…(plays back tape)

**Fine. **(writes a check and hands over)

_Nice doing business. _(leaves room)

(to self) **How did it end up this way?**

* * *

In an undisclosed location:

_**Imai, you have the stuff?**_

_Sure I do Nogi. _(holds out tape recorder and plays)

(reaching for it) **_Thanks Imai-san_**_**.**_

_That doesn't mean I'm giving it to you._ (puts tape recorder back)

_**Eh, what the does that mean, Imai? We had a deal.**_

_Narumi offered me more money to keep quiet._

(flustered) **_Yo_**_**u took it?**_

_Yes. But you're not going to do anything if you don't want this going around. _(opens laptop to reveal picture of Ruka riding on Piyo's back)

(red faced) _**You wouldn't.**_

_My people have already made enough copies to send to the entire school. _(closing laptop) _Nice doing business. _(walks away)

(to self) **__****_But now that means... I have to be in aroom alone with... Narumi-sensei. Tomorrow _**(calling out) _**Imai-san wait!**_

* * *

Scoreboard

Hotaru: 3 _**Winner!**_

Narumi: 0

Ruka: 0

Mikan: 0

Looks like Hotaru played everyone.

I just realized that this one is a lot longer than the last. Oh well. Thanks again to everyone that reviewed. It's nice to know that I'm not just writing for myself. It means a lot to me. Up next is Nogi Ruka… or a mystery guest I haven't decided yet. It may take me a little longer to get these up for now on. Review!


	5. Nogi Ruka

I know, I know this took forever to update. *Insert cliche excuse here* I'm super sorry but here it is.

**Narumi **_Student he decides to harass _Everything else _Other stuff_

**Disclaimer: **Wish as I might I will only own Gakuen Alice when I marry a Martian and own Kraft Cheese.

* * *

Narumi peered over his desk at the blonde haired blue eyed elementary school boy in front of him. Nogi Ruka had finally decided to show up to recieve his results. It had only taken about two days and four reschedulings. Not surprisingly enough the class had held bets, run exclusively by Hotaru and her partner in crime Koko, on how long it would take Ruka to man up and show up for his appointment. Now here they were sitting awkwardly waiting for someone to start the converation. Narumi of course was completely oblivious to the fact that Ruka had plotted to downcast him in order to get out of their little appointment. But of course dispite being annoyed that he was stood up not once but four times- Narumi had one every been stood up by one person his entire life, Narumi felt too tired to bother today.

(clapping hands together) **Okay lets get this over with.**

_Okay then. _(patting Usagi)

**Since I pretty much agree with Jin-Jin I'll just come out and say it. A vet.**

_..._

**Looks like we're done. **(standing up)

_Wait that's all?_

**I thought you wanted to get out of this as fast as possible. **(crossing arms)

_But I-I thought you're supposed to-_

(sighing) **What say something inspiring. **

_There's one name for it._

(whining) **Ah Ruka-pyon. **(waggling finger) **If you wanted to hear something inspiring you shouldn't have skipped on all of your appointments.**

_Erm... _(shifting around uncomfortably)

**Well if you insist. **(sits down and clasps hands together) **Rather than being a vet there are many other job opportunities for you and someone with your alice. You could help save endangered species of animals or even work with wild life preservation. There are jobs available so that you can tame wild animals so that they can adjust to humans and teach people to properly respect animals. In the long run there are several job oppurtunies available to you if you look past the standard vet. **(hands a stack of brochures)

(inspecting brochures) _Thank you sensei?_

**No problem. I suggest that you take those with you to look at.**

_Hai. Thank you. _(gets up to leave)

Later

Narumi follow Misaki around the latter's greenhouse then into Misaki's office. Misaki sits his desk with ungraded papers while Narumi lays down on the couch. His feet hang over the armrest and he closes his eyes and folds his arms behind his head to prop it up. Misaki lets out a sigh.

**He was fidgeting the entire time. It's like he was afraid of me, Misaki-kun. I'm not even a scary person.**

_Well he didn't have the misfortune of knowing you when you were younger._(to self) _That kid is an excellent judge of character._

(whinning) **But Misaki~kun I didn't even do anything.**

_He probably heard what happened to Natsume... Don't you have papers to grade._

**That's boring. **(furrows eyebrows and crinkles nose)

_Get your feet off my couch I'm not your therapist._

(ignoring) **Tomorrow I have Shoda Sumire.**

_Then good luck. _(looks up for first time) _By the way. I want my bean whips back._

**I don't have any.**

_Anjo..._

(running away) **I don't have then.**

_Narumi get back here with my bean whips! _(running after him)

* * *

So up next is Sumire. What to do, what to do... Review!


End file.
